Sitting at my desk, in first hour, I stare off nervously. I’ve noticed I’ve been doing that a lot. I don't know why i do it. Actually i do. Things make me mad very easily. Some people are able to let things go, but i can't. That's why Brittney (whose name could be something else, but why not have a Brittany.) scares or irritates me so much now. She does the littlest things. She knows I can’t let things go. She use to be my best friend, the person that was there to help me try and let things go, but she's not anymore. She’s not even my friend. I friend wouldn't do what she does. My mood goes up and down all day. I can go from being happy and then, there they go. They say they aren't being mean but, that's like saying the world is flat. It's actually really annoying because i want to be happy. I want to be the old me, not this one now. I hate this girl, the one that i have somehow become. One minute i can be perfectly fine, like right now, but then
In my room i examine my once picture filled room. The walls are now bare. Bare from the pictures that use to hang there. The ones i printed off and strung across my grey room. The ones that reminded me of the good times i had, the happy moments, and the life i want back. The pictures are now neatly in my drawer, near my bed. I was going to throw them away, but i wasn't able to throw those moments away. I couldn't act like they didn't mean something to me because they did. I could act like britney. Act like they never happened,likei don’t exist, and act like i’m the worse person ever, but again can't do that. I've went to the drawer with the intention of slipping them into the trash. My long, dark, hands grasp them and my feet move towards the trash, but when i try to let them go i freeze. I just can't do it. I lay back on my bed, eyes shut, reflecting back onto my day. My horrible, headache wrenching day. yesterday I tried to lie to Chloe about something th